FRIDAY THOUGHTS #72: IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT

 

It's all your fault.

Yes, all of it. Every situation that you've come across in your life whether you created the situation or not, it's definitely your fault how you respond to it. No one in this world has control over your feelings or any unfavorable situation you may be in, except the person staring at you in the mirror. Money issues? Your fault. Unhappy? Your fault. Have a job you hate? Your fault. Relationship issues? Your fault. Divorced? Your fault. Overweight? Your fault. Snow's falling outside? Er, okay...lol this is definitely not your fault, but you get my point.

Too many people nowadays see a problem in their life and point the finger at anyone or anything other than themselves. I get it though, it's much easier to blame something outward for our shortcomings rather than to blame ourselves and now be forced to make a change in our behavior.  It's easier to blame something else in the short term, however, in the long run all you end up doing is drastically stunting your character growth.

When you think everything is someone else’s fault, you will suffer a lot. When you realize that everything springs only from yourself, you will learn both peace and joy.
– Dalai Lama

When I went through my divorce 10 years ago, I was so hurt - it was my first real heartbreak...It broke my heart to pieces, but my spirit never succumbed to the deep waters it was plunged into. Nope, not at all - in actuality what it did was release a part of my inner beast that was dormant. Every painful experience I've ever been through since then has done just that - they've all taken me to another level in my character. I'm so thankful for that painful situation many years ago and I'm thankful for the growth caused by every other painful situation since: from losing family members, finance issues, health issues, etc. - every heartache has been a blessing in my life. At the end of the day, that is what pain is for: to grow us and I've used it precisely for that. Now, when I was going through the divorce I was angry, I was angry that I had to go through something as heartbreaking as what I went through...however, as I've matured and stepped away from the situation, I realize that it was all my fault. No one to blame at all, but me. If I had more understanding/knowledge of self, we wouldn't have even gotten married. She's an amazing and very beautiful woman, however, she isn't my type in many ways. It took me years to figure that out. Of course it was bound to crumble, I didn't even know myself and I was committing to someone for the rest of my life. My lack of knowledge caused me intense heartache, however, that pain was necessary. All pains are necessary and if you metabolize them correctly they simply prepare you for the next level of life. I'm almost at a point where challenging situations genuinely excite me.

It's liberating to take blame for everything, because when you do, you inadvertently put yourself in direct position to change everything. If you're the one to blame...then you're the one that can change it. Now I'm not absolving guilt from anyone else that could be involved, that is their karma that they have to personally deal with on their own, that's none of our business - I only want to focus on you and I...and you my friend are not a victim, you are a victor. 

Respectfully, I don't care what terrible situation you were raised in, I don't care what "Mommy and Daddy" did or didn't do for you growing up,  I don't care what "side of the tracks" you were raised in, I don't care about what "issues" you may have, the bottom line is this: you can have, be and become anything you want when you take personal responsibility for who you are today. 

Yes, it will be uncomfortable to admit blame. Yes, it will be...however, it will be more uncomfortable to stay in that same situation. Take full responsibility for everything in your life, even if you may not have created it, how you respond to it is 100% your responsibility...it's your fault. Now change the programming and let's get to work so we can change those situations and display all of our God-given potential. You're a champion: people desperately are seeking and needing what you have - do the inner work and continue to give it to them. 👊🏾 #bless